Does this ever happen to you? It happens to me. Every. Single. Time. I’m working on my latest story or making a colorful graph depicting my predicted end date based on my ambitious daily word goals (also a work of fiction, by the way). In the corner of the screen, I see the pop up.… Read More The self-inflicted wound of denial
What follows is an abbreviated version of a text exchange that transpired this morning—after the reality that my kid is all grown up and moving across the country in three months hit me right in the forehead, and I spent a sleepless night thinking about all the things she needs to have, get, or do… Read More Life is not all unicorn farts and sprinkles.
At a conference last year, an author spoke about revising her manuscripts with a look of rapture usually reserved for the sacred or the sensual. My first thought? Are you kidding me?! What about revising and editing could possibly evoke this level of euphoria? Personally, my goal is to write THE END on the last… Read More Revising: A part of life
A wise friend made a point with me last week. My friend sent me a photograph of a snow shovel ( a tool with which I am all too familiar). The caption said, ‘This is a great tool. Unless you’re holding the red end. Then you’re going to be frustrated.’ I love it when someone… Read More You can’t shovel snow with the handle.
Thirty-eight months ago,I wanted a time machine so I could pop back to her first day of kindergarten and feel her tiny, baby-soft hands hugging my neck. Mwaa! Her kiss on my cheek before she skipped off to meet Mrs. Bean. Thirty-six months ago,I wanted a flat tire so we would have to stop. Stop… Read More Is breá liom tú níos mó. (I love you more.)
Winter is waning. As I was waiting for my two Boxers to sniff every blade of grass in the back yard the other day, I took one look at my garden and started reviewing the offspring of all of my friends in hopes that one was the mother of a child with a penchant for… Read More My life is a garden, and it needs weeding.
Is this The Great Resignation? Or is it just time for us all to be resigned?… Read More Let’s Be Resigned
I believe we are rocks. I believe there is a core to us that is solid and defined. I believe we are all born inherently good, beautiful, perfect, and valuable. Things happen to us. Whether it is an earthquake that sharpens our edges or a river that smooths them out, we are still that rock. We are still that good, beautiful, perfect, valuable being. #TrueSelf #Blog #SEL … Read More You’re not an egg. You’re not spaghetti sauce. You are a rock.
I was a big baby the last week of August. I didn’t realize it until Tuesday morning when I was putting on my gear to go for a ride at 4:45 AM. After a week of riding in the high 40’s in tights and long sleeves (Did I mention it was AUGUST?!), I declared it… Read More One word can change your world.
It’s quite extraordinary if you think about what the human body can adapt to. More profound is the ability of the human spirit to adapt to survive. But what should we adapt to? Let’s adapt to social emotional wellbeing!… Read More We adapt…. but should we?
I spent the last weekend with my daughter. She called it the Ultimate Mother-Daughter, Foodie, Coffee Shop Writing, Shopping, Rodeo Weekend. (We need to work on a catchier title. That’s never going to fit on a bumper sticker). The Adventure Days and Mother-Daughter Dinner Dates of her childhood have evolved into weekends at her home… Read More 282 Miles – Zero Distance
Some time ago, dear friends of mine retired and moved from Washington to Texas. I am terrible at goodbyes. That should be evident by the fact that this blog has been sitting half-written for nearly a year. I had intended to write it the morning after their going away party. I started to, but the… Read More It’s Never About The Furniture
It has been my experience that Boxers are particularly sensitive dogs. Every time my husband sneezes, for example, Buttercup rushes to his aid. When my daughter is sad, Delta refuses to leave her side. The mere sight of a suitcase throws them into malaise. So, you can imagine how mortified I was when, after just… Read More Boxers, Banjos and Bravery
Rejection doesn’t have to be evidence of failure. It can be a redirection toward a better opportunity. It is one of the most important lessons on the road to publishing. … Read More Rejection = Redirection
I find that sometimes I hold onto things far too long because, even if they are clunky or difficult, I know how they work, and I know how to fix them when they don’t. As long as what I am doing is working for me, I am not likely to change. But there is this tipping point between comfortable but always difficult and uncomfortable but eventually easy. I know when I am desperately reaching over the fulcrum trying to tip the balance toward comfortable.… Read More As Easy as Learning to Ride a Bike
We got a puppy a couple of weeks ago. The stars aligned, and we welcomed Delta, a brindle boxer, into our home. We had been planning it for some time. Buttercup missed having someone to play with since we lost her older brother, Buddy. The humans missed having a puppy to cuddle (and completely blocked out the… Read More The Truth – In Comparison
Have you ever had one of those dreams that is so real you wake up with a start, gasping for air, heart pounding, momentarily stunned to find yourself in your own bed, safe and sound? It happens to me. I have always had very real, very complicated dreams. If I could remember them all, I would probably have… Read More When Dreams are the Real Deal
I just turned 54. Normally I like to throw myself a big party. I like birthday parties. I like a house full of people I love- laughing, eating and talking. I think we should celebrate life every chance we get. But this year has been a quiet birthday. There is just so much going on at… Read More The thought absolutely counts. In fact, it might be the only thing that really does.
Suffering usually comes from wanting things to be different than the way they are. – Pema Chödrön I have always been a driven person. I don’t spend a lot of time bemoaning a situation. I am a hunter by nature. I see a problem. I hunt it down to the exclusion of all other things. I… Read More The pointless pain of wanting it to be different.
She skated into town in 10th grade. I always worried about the new kids. I had a lot of experience being the new kid. I knew that it was infinitely harder when you landed in a small town where lifelong friendships were forged in bassinettes. She didn’t strike me as a country girl either. She held… Read More Battles of Courage and Love: Cindy’s Journey
Last weekend, our daughter graduated from high school. I brought three packages of tissues to the ceremony and a camera with a 600 mm lens. I was not going to miss her face as she walked across the stage. I was prepared to weep openly, unapologetically, for two hours. I didn’t open a single package.… Read More Big Love
My father tore the carpet out of our house a few weeks before my sister’s wedding. The carpet started out the color of sand on a southern beach. After years of being trampled on by firewood toting teenagers, it had grown dingy and rough. Once he got a thought in his head, it was like… Read More The Busyness of Avoiding
My career got off to a rocky start. The ink was still drying on my degree and teaching certificate, as I set out to find my first teaching job. With the optimism of Shirley Temple and the enthusiasm of a Mouseketeer, I combed the job postings. I soon discovered that the widely-advertised science teacher shortage did not apply… Read More Obstacles and Opportunities
It has been my experience that kids hit certain milestones at different times. It’s tempting to think life is like school with its chronological march from Kindergarten to the senior year, as if time were the only determinant. The fact is that most of what happens in a child’s life is based on a whole… Read More You know, when you know.
It’s 4:15 AM and my REM-induced travels are abruptly ended by my clock radio blaring Miranda Lambert. In silence, I get up, get dressed, and brush my teeth. In the workout room, I turn on the fan and put my bike shoes on. I spend 30 minutes on the bike, change shoes and put in… Read More Make a Habit of It
I do not like endings. I do not like finales. It is probably why I don’t watch the Oscars or stay awake until the last votes are counted on election night. I much prefer those hours and days before the endings, days that are thick with anticipation and ripening possibilities. Even as a kid, I… Read More Endings and Beginnings
Beliefs are an amazing thing. Though intangible, they have a weight and power all their own. They can propel us to great heights or they can keep us chained to the ground. What is a belief after all- it is just a thought you have over and over until you take it to be the… Read More I’ll see it when I believe it.
As soon as I shut the door, I knew. I heard the click of the lock and my stomach sank to my feet. I collapsed forward. My forehead hit the top of the window giving me an unobstructed view of my purse and both sets of my car keys sitting prominently on the passenger seat… Read More Empathy Gap – Don’t Fall In
For the last couple of weekends, I have been shooting my daughter’s senior portraits. It was so special to me that I was able to do this for her- that she wanted me to do this for her. Though I have shot a number of senior portraits and I always feel honored to do it,… Read More Adventure Days!
I remember when we picked him up. After months of looking, we found him at a breeder in Omak. My husband has a knack for tracking down the best pups. Dog-less for a year or more, we finally decided it was time for our daughter to have her own dog. After much negotiations on breed,… Read More A Girl’s Best Friend
The summer before 5th grade, my father took me on a week-long backpacking trip in Glacier National Park. We planned the trip over the spring on our every-other-weekend visits. My dad pinned a map to the wall in the living room of his one-bedroom apartment. Back then, the map shifted from grey to a deep… Read More Making Memories Under the Big Sky
In a couple of weeks, my daughter will begin her senior year. Stamped in my mind and on my heart is a picture of her decked out in pink from head to toe; smiling from ear to ear; proudly carrying her backpack filled to the brim with fresh school supplies on her first day of… Read More I Got This, Mama!
I’ve had so many friends over the years who describe gardening as a zen-like experience. I, myself, have had zen-like experiences but never while gardening. I don’t doubt my plant-loving friends. I find that zen feeling while cycling or painting or staring through my lens or doing yoga. I want to love gardening. I want… Read More Elusive Zen of Gardening
When I was a little kid, I felt strangely like two different people. In retrospect, I imagine that other children of divorce felt the same way. But it was the 70’s and divorce was rare in our Catholic community, so I didn’t have anyone to compare my experience with. You see my parents were diametrically… Read More Two Sides of the Same Girl
It was a spring, Saturday morning in Georgia. My father must have been away on business because, had he been home, I would never have realized my own true power. It was just my stepmom and me. Our blended family was new and more like a salad than soup. Still getting to know each other… Read More Stronger Than I Thought
I have been reminiscing a lot lately. I am not sure if it is the passing of my father, my daughter’s impending senior year or just the end of the school year. Whatever it is, I find myself smiling – a lot. I have such great memories. Rebuilding our fire pit reminds me of all… Read More Just Beneath the Surface
Sometimes things just happen, good and bad, that you just can’t predict. Despite my propensity for planning and my natural tendency toward being a hunter, I have learned that sometimes you have to roll with the punches and trust there is a lesson you need to learn. I didn’t always feel this way. No, this… Read More Change is hard but not changing is harder…
I’ve always wished that I could be one of those women who goes through life with nothing more than their cell phone in their back pocket ensconced in one of those really cute Kate Spade cases with a sleeve for their drivers license and debit card. A quick swipe of mascara and lip gloss, hair… Read More Lighten Up!
Catherine Matthews 